Almost two months since my last post?!

Oh dear. Time flies by so quickly...I'm constantly reminded of it, but seeing that my last post was October 27th is quite scary.
What makes me sad though is how many fun and interesting things have happened in those 2 months since I last posted, that I have failed to include on here. Maybe I'll be doing some late blog writing about everything wonderful in December.
But, it really has been a great month. Some hard things were thrown in for sure. Overall, I was just reminded almost everyday just how blessed I am. It seems to be happening more and more lately when I get these overwhelming moments of emotion that I can't seem to handle. Thankfully, it's in a good way. I will literally be in the midst of something that is a regular day to day thing and then suddenly I just start crying because I feel the tremendous amount of God's grace on my life. Sometimes it's in the stillness and other times it's thrown into a really busy day.

Experiencing such amazing moments as these, I am left with a grateful heart. I'm grateful because I really have never experienced these times so frequently before. And I think it's come through prayer. Just trying to give everything to Him and be thankful for the little blessings that He bestows upon me and my family. He's been so faithful. And I am falling in love with God because of that very thing; His abundant love and unchanging character is something to be treasured. It's something I haven't treasured enough in my life for a long time.

So my eyes have been opened to a lot this month. Primarily, God has just shown me how gracious He is and continues to be. Also, He's made me more aware of how I need to change. There are those big things in my heart that need major improvement...but they're not too big for Him to change. That's exciting!

A Friday to look forward to.

This week has been a week of getting back into the swing of life since our trip. I was super excited on Tuesday evening to have attended Autumn Knights. The music was absolutely beautiful and it was great seeing the familiar faces and good friends.
Thankfully, school work hasn't been to bad. Math is the thing weighing the heaviest but that's always the case. What I'm most excited about is tomorrow. Fridays are always the best, but especially this one. I get to have two coffee dates in one day with two of the sweetest friends I could ask for. It will be awesome just to catch up on life lately and open up. I definitely am ready for some good conversation and quality time.
Can't wait to get my school work done for the week to enjoy the beautiful day tomorrow!

Home again.

So we're back. We arrived home on Friday evening after what seemed like a VERY long day of traveling. Both flights were delayed so we spent extra time in Albany and New Jersey. The highlight though was looking out the window of Newark Airport and seeing the empire state building across the way in New York City. It was honestly beautiful at sunset.
The rest of our trip back east was beautiful though. I really loved all the colors and adventures we took. Joanne was sweet to have us for the week and on Thursday we had a fun time spending the night at my grandma's. We went out for a sweet dinner and it was a nice ending to the trip.
Over the time of our trip, I got the chance to relax and journal and read which was heavenly. Something I usually can't dedicate time to when I'm at home doing school stuff. I finished King's Cross by Timothy Keller and I absolutely loved it. It spoke to me on so many things I desire to overcome. It definitely made it clear that I can only move beyond my struggles with the Lord's help. It just doesn't happen when I'm not seeking Him. But in the evenings, after I did some school work, I just had really sweet quiet times. Joanne and her husband would be asleep and my mom and I would stay up and read. I made tea most nights and then just sat in the stillness, thinking and praying. After reading and writing in my journal, I listened to the same artists every night; Jon Foreman, Evan Wickham, Phil Wickham, and Joseph Tata. One song that I can't stop listening to is "I'll Follow You" by Evan Wickham. Everything about it is fantastic and so worshipful. I kinda sing it in my heart as a prayer. The bridge of the song says:

Farther than the farthest place,
Deeper than the deepest space,
All the way to Your embrace, I’ll follow You.
Better than this life by far, brighter than the brightest star
Is the light of who You are. I’ll follow You.
Greater than the things of earth, greater than the universe,
Greater still, You loved me first. I’ll follow You.

I'm pretty much just seeking to find peace in Him right now. My heart is hungry for that peace and I really just want to restore what I've been putting aside for awhile.

So I'm back and I'm ready for the restoration.

Sweet Company and Apples to Apples

Today we went to Joanne's church. It was wonderful and Kari and Bart joined us which made it even better. It was a neat service of sharing testimonies and after, Kari and Bart came to Joanne's house where we had a bunch of fun fall snacks. It was great just sitting around and relaxing together.
After dinner, we had coffee and got into our pajamas. The weather is chilly outside so it felt so nice to be warm and bundled up inside. We brought out some ice cream and made popcorn as we played Apples to Apples. We had so many laughs, it was fantastic.

Manchester

Today we had such a great time. We headed to Manchester for lunch at the Little Rooster Cafe. I had the most amazing grilled sandwich and we sat and had coffee while the wind and the chilly air blew around outside. It was cozy and sweet and super fun to people watch out the window. We kept commenting on all the sweet married couples that were going for walks. Some looked like young honeymooners, others looked old and gray and still in love. And one couple was pregnant! It was adorable...
After, we went to a few outlets and hit some really good sales. I'm excited about the new clothes I got. Super cheap and cute, gotta love Banana Republic and J.Crew. Anyways, it was a blast and we had so many laughs as well.
We headed home for dinner and then to Joanne's church for a fall harvest event/birthday party for their pastor. It was really fun to be able to participate in the fun with all of her church friends. I met some really sweet people and got to spend the evening having awesome conversations and eating yummy desserts.
It felt nice to come back home after such a long day. I made some tea and then worked on school work. I'm pretty happy that I have been staying on top of my class work as I've been away! Feels nice to not be behind, even though I wish I didn't have to stay up in the night doing homework but it's all good!
I'm going to enjoy some reading in King's Cross and journaling before I hit the hay. It's always the best way to finish off any day. Especially when all you have to write down are prayers of thanksgiving and a list of the day's blessings.
God is so good.

Such a Fun Day

So today was low-key and really fun! After having morning coffee with my mom and Joanne, I got ready and had a really sweet time just to journal and relax. We headed out for lunch and Joanne took the most beautiful route to town.

And now, we're all on the porch and having Autumn Delight tea. I love just talking and enjoying the nice company...and I love listening to the crickets!

Here!

So we got in this morning and it has been great already. Kari picked us up and on our way to Joanne's home, she took a brief detour through the hills and I got a few shots of the Autumn morning. We dropped off our things at Joanne's and then headed out for lunch. Spending time with Kari is so nice and now I'm blogging in a sweet little house. I had a nap, Billy made a yummy spaghetti dinner, and now we're sitting in the living room drinking tea. I'm really excited to be here. It's so surreal right now, but after I have more sleep and wake up tomorrow, I'm going to be so ready for the adventures to begin!

Packing!

So I'm currently in the midst of packing for our trip to New York tomorrow! I can't believe how fast time flies. But I'm really looking forward to this visit. Staying with Joanne and being away from the day to day routine at home will be a nice change for a bit. It was absolutely the Lord who made this trip possible with school and everything and the timing couldn't be any more perfect. I'm so thankful.

My hope for this trip is to get closer to the Lord. I've realized there are a lot of changes I have to make in my spiritual life and I haven't been walking with Him as closely as I should be. So I am planning to wake up early each morning, get all bundled up in a blanket, and grab a cup of tea for Bible reading and meditation in my pj's on the porch. God has been so good to me through providing for this trip and it is up to me to make it worth while.

We have so many fun things planned too! Joanne has some days off and during that time we are going to visit The Whistling Kettle for lunch and afternoon tea, go to Bennington Pottery, and drive through Manchester. Also, I hope that while we are in Manchester we have tea or coffee at the Equinox...that would be such a treat. And! Since we'll get back in time for dinner each night, I am going to blog every night about our days, pictures and all. That way, it can be a little journal of the adventures.

I know I have to work on school work when I'm there, but I'm trying not to stress and I'm giving it to the Lord and trusting Him that I will have enough time for work and play.

Okay, so back to packing...

God is Sovereign.

One of the things that I have been meditating on this week is the truth that God is sovereign.
He holds everything in His hands and nothing is outside of His control. I have hope that the Lord will be faithful to bring to completion what he is stirring in my heart. (Phil. 1:6)
I see the importance in placing my identity fully in Christ and nothing or no one else. I need to place my hope in Him because he promises me that He is unfailing and He is rich in mercy and forgiveness when I have fallen.

All of these things being said, I want so badly to just fall in love with Jesus. To be completely dependent on Him and trust Him through all things. Change is hard but God is good.

First Day of October!

Yay! A new month. October has arrived and I'm super excited for the things in store. In less than 2 weeks, my mom and I will be flying back east to stay with our lovely friend and her husband. I am so ready to see the leaves and drink tea on Joanne's sweet porch. The day after I get back is homecoming! I'm looking forward to getting dressed up and having fun.
At the moment, the amount of school work I have to complete in order to breathe on my trip is a little overbearing it seems. But I know that I'll get it done. It's going to feel fantastic getting on the plane stress free and done with the PSAT.

Happy October!

Family Fun in Balboa

        On Saturday morning, my family and I went to the Balboa Fun Zone. Sadly, they will be removing their 1930's carousel from the area and replacing the space with more of the museum. This is a huge disappointment to see a piece of loved history being taken away forever. But it was great to see so many Orange County locals come out to have one last ride. We had such a blast riding the ferris wheel, taking pictures, riding the carousel, and eating cotton candy. I had to get a balboa bar since it's always a must when you visit the area. Chocolate dipped and rainbow sprinkled goodness on a stick. What could be better? Though fall has begun and the weather was pretty gloomy, it felt like an official end to summer beach days. I'm ready for the new season and the fun activities that come along with it. I have a lot of things I'm hoping to do before Thanksgiving arrives. Sounds far away but it always sneaks up so fast before you know it. 

I absolutely adored the time I had with my family at the fun zone. Such a simple, old fashion joy.

A Week of Celebration

Last week was totally blog worthy. I feel like I just haven't made the time for sharing all that's been going on in life lately. But here I go!
So last week was my sister's birthday, my birthday, and Nathan's birthday! Branyn is now 21 years old and she had a lot of fun celebrating with her friends. Nathan and I turned 17. to add the the fun we're all 2 days apart. Branyn is the 20th, mine is the 22nd, and Nathan's is the 24th. Pretty cool. But it was an awesome week to say the least. Nathan surprised me with the sweetest birthday gift. (That kept going on and on it seemed.) He came to my house to take me on a picnic. He picked up a bunch of Italian food from Claro's Market and some Stewart's orange creme and grape sodas. To top it off, he got me a chocolate eclair. It was like heaven to sit in the sun in the park and enjoy all the goodies. His parent's gifted me with these wonderful olive oils and balsamic vinegars from the store "41 Olive." So to tack on to the meal, we tried them all with a fresh loaf of bread. Oh my goodness, so good! Then we just spent hours at the park chatting and enjoying the quiet. We were even privileged to meet a sweet German man who introduced us to his dog Winston. His name was Sieggy. But we chatted with him for about 15 minutes and he told us a little about his life in Europe. He enjoyed a grape soda as well with us and we were so happy to have met him. Nathan also gifted me with the cutest card and the most beautiful journal that I wanted from Barnes and Noble.
Just a short time after getting home from the park, I opened my door to find the most amazing and thoughtful gifts from my friend Elizabeth. She dropped them by and it was just the sweetest thing. A gorgeous red and yellow topiary for fall (which she made with her mom with love) and the most incredible and huge book of Life Magazine Christmas ads from the 1940's. She knows me so well, it's crazy. That book was so fun to look through and her card was just so heartfelt. I am so blessed with her as a friend.
With family, I decided to switch things up and skip the cake this year. What I really wanted was just a nice evening out with them having lattes. So I got a pumpkin spice latte from Peet's and with our goodies we walked around a fantastic shopping center. The air was nice and the center was lit with lights. We talked and enjoyed each other's company. Then....I found my homecoming dress in Anthropologie. On sale, floor length, and sweet heart neckline. I'm so excited to wear it and it was a blessing to find.
So that was my birthday! And on Saturday, I had the honor of having dinner with Nathan. It was so much fun and since he knew a sweet waitress there, she surprised us each with ice cream sundaes with a candle in both. It was so nice of her and it really made the night even more special. We had coffee, walked around, and looked at cute kitty cats in Petsmart. It was grand!
The week was full of fun and blessings.

And She's Back!

Branyn got home yesterday from South Africa. It was such a blast going to LAX to pick her up and see her shining face again after all these weeks. She looked so cute and it was so awesome to hear a bit about her trip. She definitely had a lot of highlights...she has a huge heart for Africa and being on mission there. One of the things she mentioned is the fact that everywhere you turn, there seems to be a need in that area.   I'm so glad she got the opportunity to visit and serve. She also went on a safari, where she had an amazing encounter with a rhino just feet away from her. She drank coffee in whimsical cafes all lit up with strings of lights and got to eat some fun food popular in the culture.
It always amazes me to see where God takes His disciples. I have yet to go on a mission trip, but I'm really looking forward to that day. Branyn's stories really inspired me to seriously start praying about mission opportunities. (except the stories about the huge cockroaches and spiders the size of her hand...) But aside from those things, what could be better than sharing the Gospel to nonbelievers or meeting fellow Christians on the other side of the world? I really do think that Branyn will return to Africa this upcoming summer and stay for a longer period of time like she hopes to and is now planning. Maybe my family will go along for a bit with her! We are definitely feeling the pull on our hearts to go. But for now, we're keeping it in prayer and just seeing what happens.

It's only four days into this new month and it has already been such an awesome September!

Beautiful Things

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new
You are making me new

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new

I have officially fallen in love with Gungor. Their songs are beautiful and so worshipful and I can't get enough of this song Beautiful Things. I am really anxious to get their new CD "Ghosts Upon the Earth".  I would highly recommend for you to check out some of their music as well!

A Very Belated Post.

So last month, my beautiful cousin Kari came out for a visit. It was so much fun showing her around California and going to the beach. We also saw the play The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis which was awesome to see. My highlight from her trip though was definitely the long talks over tea we had in the morning. She is so delightful and she gives such amazing advice. I love to hear her stories about past experiences she's had, her humor is too much. We were all so blessed to have had her out here with us. I can't even wait to see her this Fall!

Sweet Day

Yesterday, was my mom's birthday and parent's anniversary. It was a very low key day for sure, since both of my parents had busy schedules. But the morning was delightful. My dad and I ran out to get my mom a little cake from Nothing Bundt Cakes (so good!) and some fresh pink roses to make a bouquet. We decked out the table with her gifts, cake, and flowers for our mini celebration. It was fun to sit around and have coffee and enjoy the beginning of the day together. It was so awesome how it all worked out because as we sat together and mentioned how we wish Branyn was present to share in the fun, she called from Africa and sang happy birthday with the team! After, we all got the chance to talk a bit to her and hear about her trip. It was such a blessing.
Since the day was a bit scattered, my parents are planning on celebrating more on Friday by going out for dinner. My mom decided that she wants to go to Five Guys :) I can't help but love them..they are too cute.

It feels like such a long time since I last blogged! And so much has happened. This is my last week of summer, but I still want to add photos of our wonderful visit with Kari. Having her out here was so much fun and we're so thankful she got to come out.  We fit quite a bit into the time she was here and tried to show her some fun California places. More details on that soon!
It's been such a sweet summer.

Sunday Bake Sale

Yesterday, my church had a bake sale for the Beacon of Hope missions trip to Africa in August! Branyn is super excited and it's amazing how the Lord has provided for her to go. With the bake sale, we had a a little yard sale type thing set-up as well. Just with these two, the team made $500! It was so awesome to see the generosity of the people in our church with their donations. I'm really excited for Branyn!

Desiring God.

This evening, my family and I attended the first Desiring God class at my church. Each Tuesday we meet, we're assigned two chapters of John Piper's book Desiring God. Today in preparation for the night class, I read chapters one and two and simply fell in love with his writing and the message.
I found myself convicted within the first chapter. He focused on the command we have on our lives to glorify Christ and find our treasure in Him alone. Not the perks of being a follower of Christ, but just loving Him for who He is. His love, compassion, and grace towards us. John Piper quoted C.S. Lewis several times and one segment he included was amazing. It was taken from Lewis' book, Reflections on the Psalms. Here he writes on how he wrestled with the idea that "God not only wants our praise, but commands it." Sorry for the long addition from C.S. Lewis, but it's so worth reading.

"But the most obvious fact about praise – whether of God or anything – strangely escaped me. I thought of it in terms of compliment, approval, or the giving of honour. I had never noticed that all enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise unless . . . shyness or the fear of boring others is deliberately brought in to check it. The world rings with praise – lovers praising their mistresses [Romeo praising Juliet and vice versa], readers their favourite poet, walkers praising the countryside, players praising their favourite game – praise of weather, wines, dishes, actors, motors, horses, colleges, countries, historical personages, children, flowers, mountains, rare stamps, rare beetles, even sometimes politicians or scholars. . . . Except where intolerably adverse circumstances interfere, praise almost seems to be inner health made audible. . . . I had not noticed either that just as men spontaneously praise whatever they value, so they spontaneously urge us to join them in praising it: 'Isn't she lovely? Wasn't it glorious? Don't you think that magnificent?' The Psalmists in telling everyone to praise God are doing what all men do when they speak of what they care about. My whole, more general, difficulty about the praise of God depended on my absurdly denying to us, as regards the supremely Valuable, what we delight to do, what indeed we can't help doing, about everything else we value. I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation. It is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete till it is expressed. It is frustrating to have discovered a new author and not to be able to tell anyone how good he is; to come suddenly, at the turn of the road, upon some mountain valley of unexpected grandeur and then to have to keep silent because the people with you care for it no more than for a tin can in the ditch; to hear a good joke and find no one to share it with..." 

(Enjoying God Ministries)

I found this passage so easy to relate too. It made me fall even more in love with Lewis! I can't wait to meet him one day.

 

So Much to Love This Summer

 

This summer has been busy for sure. I'm a little sad that I haven't been blogging on the way, so I wouldn't have to back track and go over all the events so far. But, I have been blessed the past couple of weeks with lovely summer days. 

Things I have loved so far:

-Lunch with Mikayla at Bruxie.

-Afternoon cafe time with Brooke and Elizabeth

-Summer night walks when the weather is perfect!

-Emilie's beautiful backyard sweet 16 party

-Swimming and enjoying the sunshine.

-Evenings around Nathan's fire pit...attempting to make s'mores.

-Volunteering as a VBS assistant at Trinity and being blessed with a great group of 4th grade girls for the week.

-Charlene's sweet 16 birthday party on a yacht.

-Lovely walks during the day (with ice cream stops)

-Bike rides! 

I'm really looking forward to more summer festivities with family and friends.

An Unexpectedly Hectic Summer So Far...

So my summer officially began on June 3rd and it has been full of stressful and bizarre circumstances so far. Not quite like I imagined my summer vacation, but I have to keep in mind that the Lord is working through everything and helping me each day.
I have had the privilege though of going for lovely walks with Nathan and attending a really fantastic birthday party for my sweet friend Emilie! These things both have brought me a lot of joy in the midst of stress. At the party I got the chance to catch up with some friends who I felt like I hadn't seen in a lifetime! They are all so fun to spend time with.

Today was a good Monday! I read some Mere Christianity in the morning, talked for hours on the phone with Elizabeth, and went for an afternoon walk with Nathan. It was just awesome to talk and enjoy the summer weather too. I feel that the summer is getting better! It's actually starting to feel more like summer. Thank goodness.

Highlights of the Weekend.

So this weekend has been a really nice one. On Friday evening, I went with my parents to a family friend's house for some food and chatting. Every Friday they open their patio for their neighbor friends to come over and enjoy time eating good food and spending time together. It was fun meeting some of their friends and drinking tea outside. They had adorable lanterns lit and everything...it was so summery and perfect.
Yesterday morning my mom and I woke up early and went for a morning walk. It's always so neat just to talk to her about life and Christianity. She definitely is full of wisdom and I look up to her for council because of that.
Today, we had a fantastic church service. The worship was lead by Joseph Pfeifer. He is such a gifted musician and It is always a treat when he visits. We're really looking forward to diving into the book of Mark for 40 weeks! Can you believe it?! I just love when we do real, in depth studies of certain books of the Bible. There is so much in every book...it's going to be really good.
I went to Panera Bread for some study time, since this week is my last week of school which means finals! I got a cookie and just sat in a corner for a while. It was quite nice just to get away and focus. It's always so pleasant there. I decided to sit outside for a time after and I met a really interesting man! He was a tennis pro and just last week he was in Paris for the tennis tournament. He showed me some lovely pictures of Paris and he also shared some neat stories full of exciting details! It made me want to visit Europe even more...But the coolest thing was the fact that I got to hear a little of his story. He was from Canada and he moved out to California years ago for a change. He loves teaching kids and teens tennis and he loves to encourage them with just life stuff as well. Apparently, he offers a course all about tennis and their dreams pertaining to the sport. He spends a lot of time talking to them about character building and life lessons...how cool! We talked for about 20 minutes and it was really neat! I was amazed at how the Lord can totally put people in your path for just a moment and you could have gained so much from the conversation. I probably won't ever see him again, but I was blessed with his company today :)
I hope you've had a lovely weekend as well! Mine was simple, but simple is always good. 

This Made My Day!

Well once again, I got majorly distracted while I was supposed to be doing my school work for the week...but this is so worth it.
Maybe you saw this today on Yahoo too? I just about flipped when I read the story headline, "Rare color photos from the 1940's". Does it get any cooler than that?! I just adore this time period so much and the few pictures they had were simply beautiful and classic.
You have to take the time to look through them. I hope you enjoy them too :)

Fun Weekend!

 This past weekend was really fun! On Friday, Nathan and I spent the day at Disneyland! I hadn't been there in 2 years, so it was a treat. Later that night, we went to Will's house for a movie night with friends. The group was a lot smaller than I expected, but it was truly a sweet time with all of them. Lucy and Jack played their guitars and sang for us all, it was wonderful. Then we just enjoyed time poolside and then gathered on the couch for the movie. So fun :) Saturday night was definitely great. I went to Kylie's sweet sixteen and it was so amazing! There was a D.J., candy table, appetizers, and her cake was beautiful! It was so neat to spend time with friends and meet new people. It was especially awesome to see old classmates from Jr. High. Just to talk to them brought back great memories :) 

I feel like I could write so much more, but all in all it was a fantastic weekend and it was such a blessing. All of this fun is making me even more anxious for summer vacation!

I Can Ride a Bike!

I know it's a little sad that at the age of sixteen I didn't know how to ride a bike...but this week I learned! It was really fun because I went to Nathan's house expecting to watch a movie. Instead, he taught me how to successfully ride a bike. It was really nerve racking at first, but after thirty minutes of his help and instruction I got the hang of it! The whole night was spent outside just riding in the cul-de-sac. It was so much fun!
Now I'm really anxious to ride more and get my own bike hopefully soon. My goal is to be confident enough in my riding to travel down to the beach :) Nathan was a fantastic teacher and he had a lot of patience with me. I'm not the fastest learner!
This was definitely the highlight of my week by far :)

Integrity.

If there is one thing that has been on my mind more than anything this week, it would have to be the importance of integrity. And being a Christian and feeling as though you have been failing in this area is a tough thing to admit. I believe this wasn't always a struggle but it's been a more recent thing of conflict in my heart. It's much easier said than done, and that's the sad truth. Though it's something I've been thinking about here and there throughout the past few months, it's hit me more this week than any time...Tonight I was reminded of it when a friend and I were having a discussion after Wednesday night church. It was a hard feeling to stop myself midway through a judging statement towards another person, because I was guilty of the exact same thing they were participating in. And it's something I talk against constantly, but it's so easy to slip and before you know it, you've completely gone against what you once stood for.
It's a tough realization and it's something I am praying for progress in. C.S. Lewis states in Mere Christianity, "progress means getting nearer to the place where you want to be. And if you have taken a wrong turn, then to go forward does not get you any nearer. If you are on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road..." I know I am a child of God and forgiven for my failures, but I feel like I've gotten distracted from my heart felt convictions and I need to make a turn to get back on the right road, like Lewis might say.
It's an amazing feeling though to look at the state of my heart and still feel God's grace and love towards me. I love the picture that is painted in Psalms when it mentions how the sacrifices of the Lord is a broken and a contrite heart. I know that He's able to work in my life when I am totally open and desiring His redemption, broken before Him. And from that, He can create something beautiful and new in my heart.

I'm praying for this new development in my heart this week.

May!

I'm so happy it's May! I love Spring and this month we will be having my sister's bridal shower. So excited to get it all together and it has been such a blessing to have so many women from Calvary Chapel who are wanting to help plan and coordinate the event. It's going to be really special and pretty! We are down to only 83 days until the wedding on July 24...I can't believe it. So exciting :) Branyn is going to make such a beautiful bride.

Hooray for a new month!

A Wonderful Week!

This past week was super fun and special. On Sunday, I went to the play "Lost and Found" at Trinity Presbyterian. I met a sweet friend Nicole at the church so we could sit next to each other during the show. It was really nice just talking with her in between and catching up a bit on what's been new in her life lately.
On Monday, Nathan and I went to the Orange Circle for lunch at Cafe Lucca! It was so fun and really good. We got gelato after our lunch and sat outside in front of the cafe. Nicole met us there and we had fun talking and walking around the circle, though almost every store we wanted to visit was closed...but it really was a fantastic day. I was pleasantly surprised with a little red teapot I wanted as well. Thanks to Nathan, I have been enjoying it everyday when I read and have tea. :)

And just to make the week even better, I got to meet up with my dear friend Elizabeth at Peet's Coffee and Tea for some catch-up time. SO nice seeing her again, and I am so grateful these Thursday tea dates are happening every week. A lot of stuff can happen from one Thursday to another :) I know that her and I are going to be best friends forever. And she has been such a blessing to me by her constant encouragement and thoughtful phone calls when she knows I'm struggling.

I am really thankful that this week has been loads better than the last week...I'm trying my best to read my Bible on a regular, daily basis and I really think that's making a big impact on my attitude towards things. As I get into my Bible though, it truly is amazing how conviction comes into play. When I spend time with the Lord I realize just how far away I've gotten from the relationship. I'm looking forward to more reading and growth this month.

Spiritual Growth for Spring.

Last week was a wonderful start to Spring. I was pleasantly surprised with a night at Color Me Mine with Nathan, went to Peet's for some tea and conversation with Elizabeth, and enjoyed my first Ben and Jerry's milkshake on Friday. Everything about the week was wonderful but then I felt like I took a major emotional dive at the end of the week. I usually don't have conflict with my parents, but this week I did. My attitude was really bad and I was disobedient to them...even though they didn't do anything to offend me. It was just that feeling you get sometimes when you seem to have no idea why you want to crawl back into your bed and cry until you fall asleep. And last night, that's pretty much what happened when I came home from a family friend's house. When we got in the car after a long night with them, my parents confronted me on the poor behavior I had for the past couple of days. We discussed the issues but it still wasn't fully resolved. By the time we got home I just didn't feel like talking about it anymore and I decided to get ready for bed. While in the midst of doing so, I couldn't help but cry. It  had been bottled up for a couple of days and I finally just let it happen.
It was a tough feeling to feel like my parents were disappointed in me. I normally don't walk around the house with a stinky attitude and a scowl on my face like I'm mad at the world. But I ended the week on a bad note...a really special and beautiful week that didn't need to end the way it did. My mom and dad both made it clear to me that they had seen a huge difference in my demeanor through the couple of days and how I've been handling my life right now when it comes to priorities. I must admit that I, sadly, have been failing to prioritize my life appropriately. Although they are fine with me spending time with friends, I can't seem to switch gears to work mode when I'm home. But rather, I'm distracted and messy with the other things that are of importance. Realizing the state if my emotions, I had some quiet time to reflect on my heart. And I found some really sad truths there. I've been slacking off majorly on the One thing that should come before all; my relationship with Christ. And when this happens, when I get far from Him, I lose my sense of conviction on the things of this world that I struggle with. I lose the desire to spend time with Him in the morning, I become too lazy at night to pick up my Bible and read a few verses to ponder when I'm laying in bed. I blame no one else but me for this spiritual laziness. But lately, I have been feeling drawn to spend time with the Lord and to work on our relationship. Which I now am trying to put more time into. This makes complete sense, but when I further myself from the Lord, I have a big change in attitude and perspective and it affects my personality. The result has been more drastic than other times when I've felt far from Him. It's basically like an inward battle right now. Wanting the intimate relationship with Him, but the conviction is rough on the way back. It's my selfishness getting in the way because I simply don't enjoy conviction (like everyone else) but it has to happen in order for me to grow.
So although it was a rough night last night, things are resolved with my parents after I apologized and had further discussion about what's taking place at the moment in my life. I'm really going to try to get my priorities in order and not lose sight of the important things in the midst of the transition I'm seeking.
Pray for me, please :)

Rain, Rain, Rain!

As much as I am really excited for Summer to come, I am so happy rain is the forecast for the weekend! I want to enjoy the gloomy weather as much as I can before the sunny and hot weather comes for the summer time.This weekend is also going to be pleasant because I get to see my best friend Elizabeth for coffee :) I haven't seen her in quite a while and now she is licensed with her dream car! I'm excited to see her and catch up!

30 Hour Famine

This past week went pretty well, though the CAHSEE testing wasn't the most exciting way to spend my time. The greatest part of the week was by far my first 30 Hour Famine experience at Trinity. I was really blessed with a great group of sweet and funny people making up our "Ethiopian tribe". The whole point of 30 Hour Famine was to experience fasting for 30 hours to feel uncomfortable and hungry like much of the people starving in foreign countries. While doing this, we raised funds for World Vision by going to homes in need of yard work or some other form of help to gain donations. Some individuals stayed at the church to do the car wash while there was also a yard sale going on. On Friday night, we had a great time at the "Dancing Upon Injustice" event with loads of amazing dancers all to help the famine's cause. After, we gathered back together and headed into the sanctuary for worship and devotionals. It was so awesome to reflect on the night and have the quiet time before we headed back to our assigned room. One of the fun things we had to do Friday night was to build a shanty, the card board huts that homeless people have on the sidewalks and what a lot of people have as their shelter in struggling countries. Though we had a lot of laughs trying to construct a house out of cardboard boxes and trash bags, it was pretty eye opening to how blessed I've been with a home and a bed and I don't have to build a shanty on a sidewalk. We failed at building a stable one and it ended up collapsing on the floor of our room. So one of our tribal members used a lemon crate box for a bed, that snapped in the middle of the night while others spent the night under tables or in little huts they built for themselves. It was a really fun experience!
We woke up early on Saturday and had morning worship before we started the day which was such a blessing. Then we went to houses and did a whole bunch of work. When we got back to the church we had the "1:30 experience". They gave us all a bus ticket to the public city buses and each group was assigned a market where we would go and try to buy food to feed our tribe with a dollar per person. This gave us an idea of what it must be like for those in other countries who try to get food with less than a dollar a day. We ended up getting a package of warm tortillas, 2 packages of Oscar Meyer deli meat, and a bag of shredded cheese. I don't think I've ever been so excited for a meal as simple and inexpensive as this :)
It was really cool how our group just worked together. We went back to the church to have our last devotional for the 29th hour of the fast and also went over what we learned from the famine. Then we broke up into our tribes again to finally eat our "feast". Before we ate we read the passage about Jeses' fast for 40 days and 40 nights, yet by the end of it He was focused on how men do not live on just food but also by the Word of God. It gave us a really good reminder before we ate together.

It was such a fun experience and I'm so grateful I got to participate in the event!

So, this past weekend was definitely a great one! On Saturday, I got together with a new friend, Nicole for some conversation at a local coffee shop. Just recently I met her and she is just so sweet and such a fun person to talk to! I was amazed at the many things we have in common with each other and time flew by so fast just talking about life experiences and also laughing over a few funny stories about ourselves. I was so blessed to have spent the time getting to know her more.
After coffee, I went to Knights of Originals with friends. It was really fun to see and also neat to see some classmates from Jr. high I hadn't seen since graduation. I'm really happy I got to go to Knights of Originals for the first time.
Sunday started with a great morning at church. We're going through Philippians with just 3-5 verses per week and I love that due to the depth that's in each small section. We touched on humility yesterday and the song "Humble King" was included in worship. Even though we hadn't sang that song in forever, I had been thinking a lot about it this week due to my Thursday night women's study. It was neat once again just to see how it fit perfectly with what had been on my heart during the week.
Now it's Monday and this week I have CAHSEE testing at school. A little nervous about the math, but I've been hearing it's practically 4th grade level. I still hope I pass on that! ;) Even though I have testing, I think this will be a great week!

His Sufficient Grace.

This week has been a wonderful start of a new month. I can't believe that it's March already!

                                                                             Source
Currently, I have begun reading C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity. All I've read so far is just the preface and chapters one and two, but even with that little amount, I feel as if it's completely changed my thinking pattern this week. He is such a gifted writer! I'm going through it with a close friend and that makes it even better. We discussed the book over tea this week and it was just such a blessing to see what penetrated each of our hearts. We ended up with some of the same things highlighted/bracketed in our books, but also some different points that we discussed. What an amazing experience it was to simply talk about Lewis' writing and be able to relate on such a deep level as Christians.
After our time together, I had my community group with my family and church friends. The topic of the night came from Philippians 2:1-4 where we focused on throwing away our selfishness and truly considering others more important than ourselves. How we treat people on a daily basis and how to conduct ourselves correctly in relationships according to God's Word were points in the discussion. A great question that our group leader asked us was, "How can you check your heart to see if you are acting selfishly?" The one answer that popped in my head was asking ourselves if we are serving the people around us out of love. Healthy relationships are made with serving each other like Christ would. A lot of times, I notice that I have a lack of a servant's heart and I'm more obtained with my needs wants.
Lastly, I heard a wonderful Wednesday night message at Trinity Presbyterian tonight. It was so amazing to see how it related to Lewis' points and the discussion of my Tuesday night group. The topic was on the way we think of other people. Many times, we view ourselves more valuable than others and see no reason why God wouldn't bestow grace upon us. This comes from looking at other's sin and comparing it to our sinful lives. Or the opposite; thinking we are lower than others and therefore believing we are undeserving of God's grace because of the things we've done. But both are wrong. We are all sinners and we are all unworthy of His abundant grace. But the beauty of it all is that He never fails to give us grace time and time again and His grace goes on forever. We closed with replacing our usual, selfish mindset to one that is looking at other's sinfulness with the hope and truth that God's grace is sufficient for them just as it is for my sinfulness.
So awesome how everything tied in together! And so encouraging!

Friendship is a Sheltering Tree.

So I know I haven't blogged in nearly forever, but I hope to get better at posting on a regular basis. I have been so busy lately, which is why I should have been blogging about all the fun stuff I've been up to. Although school is pretty busy right now, which isn't the most exciting thing ever.
Anyways, the best part of life right now is spending quality time with different friends. My sweet friend Elizabeth gifted me with the most adorable necklace for our traditional valentine's get together. Since we have been friends for years now, we'll joke around and she'll say that I'm the peanut butter to her jelly :) I love her! So, my necklace looks like a slice of bread with peanut butter, and hers a slice with grape jelly. It's just perfect and she always gives the most thoughtful gifts.
It's been great just to spend time having long discussions with special friends. I couldn't picture my life without my friends and for that I am so thankful. Memories baking with Elizabeth, long cafe discussions with Brittani, and funny conversations with Nathan have made my life so sweet and fun!
I wish these special times could last forever.

The Stylish Blogger Award

Okay, so I haven't blogged in a while but I just realized that my wonderful cousin, Kari, was awarded "The Stylish Blogger" award. She was sweet enough to pass it on to me in her chosen group of three blogs. Thanks, Kari! So, taking her blog as an example I am supposed to include seven things about me, that you may not know. So here it is! I'll try to be creative :)

1. First off, one of the things that is a very big part of who I am is the fact that I am an old soul. I love all things vintage, classic, and black and white. My favorite movies are the sweet and romantic favorites of the 40's and 50's and I have grown a love for old time photos as well. The style and cuteness of that time long ago make me want to time travel back to world war two so I could have my little victory garden and listen to big band swing as I support the troops! :)

2. Another thing about me: I love art. Anything creative or unique draws me in. Photography, painting, drawing, or even fun and bubbly crafts make my heart happy. I find it so much fun to use my imagination to think of something different and beautiful that could be expressed in a form of art. Drawing seems to be my strength at the moment, but my goal is to expand into other fun areas of art.


3. Thirdly, I have a terrible sweet tooth. Thankfully, it's not as bad as it used to be, but it's still scary. I love all things sweet and chocolaty. Just about every girl I know does too! But if you stick me in a room full of cakes, cookies, pies, or ice cream, I can't help myself from going crazy. It's just all so good!

4. Although my favorite season of the year is Autumn, there's a special place in my heart for the good old summer time. The warm weather is so nice to enjoy with family and friends by having picnics or just enjoying a dinner outdoors where the air is fresh and the crickets are loud. Although it hasn't even reached Spring yet, I am so ready for summer! I already have a list in my mind of all the fun things I want to do.

5. I am obsessed with rainbow sprinkles. And this one definitely goes along with loving summer. Since my family and I travel to the east coast each summer, through the years I have attained a favorite treat on those warm, humid days. Vanilla soft serve ice cream with TONS of rainbow sprinkles in a cone. So good. And with something so bright and colorful, how could you not smile? :)

6. Weird thing about me, I sometimes wish I was from England. A lot of the time I wish I was from England. I think it's just the adorable accent that the people have and it is just such a beautiful country from the pictures I've seen and the stories I've heard. I just picture it on a cloudy day, lots of grassy hills and cute villages. Little tea shops on the corners and cobblestone streets. Just one of the many places I hope to travel to in my life!

7. And to conclude on an even weirder note: I have a double uvula. For those of you who may be wondering what the heck I'm talking about, it's that little rain drop shaped thing hanging in the back of your throat. Strange, huh? But really cool at the same time because it looks like an upside down heart. And I have always loved hearts, so it makes it even more special and unique!



So there you go! Seven things you may have or may not have known about me. I thought this would be a lot tougher for me, but to my surprise it was fun thinking of things to include. Thank you, sweet cousin, for the award! I'm honored :)

A New Year!

So it's just a few days into the new year, 2011! I can't believe how fast time flies by. It's crazy how much you begin to realize the truth to that statement as you get older. I thought I didn't have any new year resolution for 2011, so when friends would ask I would simply tell them I wasn't interested in making a resolution...a goal for this year that I seem to always not accomplish. But it hit me after my friend, Nathan asked if I had a new years resolution. And at first I answered him back like I did with my other friends, but I found that it would in fact be a very good thing to set a goal for myself. Honestly, I have been feeling a little lazy lately and maybe a little too comfortable with that situation. So, with some thought, I have come to the conclusion that I will not have low expectations for myself this year. I'm tired of feeling as though I am slipping into that type of mindset of an "average" teenager. I want to be different, by setting the bar higher for myself. Creating more goals and getting myself more involved in the things I love to do, that I have been timid to pursue. Along with these things, I know that I'm called to live a better, more meaningful life serving the Lord. I want my life to count and that can start now. I don't want to settle with a mediocre life style as a Christian teenager knowing this calling that we all have.
So that is my resolution for the year. Having higher expectations for my life; putting effort into making it count for the Lord. I thank my friend Nathan for making me think again.