Something Bigger

It's pretty crazy to see the difference in my thought life from when I was a child to now, being a teenager. (almost adult!) Before, it was more of the things that brought temporary satisfaction & care free times with friends. Though I do continue to think of these things now, I am finding that my mind is fixed on the future just about 24/7 nowadays. I want so badly to make the right decisions about everything big. ..like schooling, living, marriage...& I never think I can do these things without the Lord being first. Truly first. Yet that has been one of the things that is also in the forefront of my mind for many different reasons.
 I was talking to  some friends of mine after church this past sunday. While talking about school I mentioned how I find I limit myself constantly. Most of the time, I can't see myself doing great things that have always been desires of mine because I think it's just too big. But what a sad way to think! I not only doubt myself by doing so, but I doubt the power of God to work in my life. And not to mention, the fear of going for something creeps in as well. But I sincerely want to fully trust Jesus with my life & expect the things that seem impossible to be possible if I take them to prayer. It always brings comfort to my soul when I think that God knows my heart. Every nook & cranny of it. Because I can just go on & on sometimes & feel like I can't quite make my emotions clear in words. And then I remember that bit of Truth. It seems to stop me from even continuing while in prayer because It feels wonderful to rest in His love.
I've been blessed this week already by meeting with my friend Brenna. She is one of the sweetest people I know & one of the greatest friends I could ask for. We had a wonderful time over hot coco & tea discussing fun stories & enjoying each other's company. She is just one of those people that you look at & want to be more like them. The Lord has truly given her a tender heart & gentle spirit that I could learn a lot from.
On Thursday, I will be saying goodbye to my dear friend, David as he goes away for basic training. I know it's just for a period of time but I hate goodbyes. David has been such an amazing friend to me over this past year & I am extremely blessed to have developed a friendship with him before he goes away. He is a true gentleman & one of the Godliest guys I know. I would have never expected to know a future soldier so well, so it definitely is heart wrenching to see him leave. I'm really looking forward to having him over for tea & conversation. I'll miss our long talks about life & Jesus. He's so insightful!
Looking at these relationships I have with such awesome people gives me such encouragement to trust in God's faithfulness. Just as He has been faithful to reconnect me with my dear friend Brenna & bring me a great Godly friend in David, He will also be faithful to carry out His plans for my life. I stress, but yet I love how unexpected life is as a Christian. His ways are so much greater than mine & I just need to find peace in that promise.